Next (2007): A Crazy Logline Based on an Even Crazier Story [Joey’s Review]

by Joey Lewandowski · Published December 4, 2015 · Updated November 19, 2017

A movie about a Las Vegas magician who can see into the future and is tasked to stop a nuclear bomb is crazy. Along with FACE/OFF, the logline for NEXT is the craziest we’ve seen so far in #CageClub. Believe it or not, though, the Philip K. Dick “novelette” that Next is based on, “The Golden Man”, is even crazier. From Wikipedia:

The protagonists of the story are a government agent and his fiancée who are members of a government agency tasked with tracking down and sterilizing or eliminating mutants- individuals with physical abnormalities and superhuman powers (such as the ability to steal the appearance and memories of others) that make them a threat to normal humans. The eponymous “Golden Man” is a feral young man named Cris with gold-colored skin, who does not appear to be sapient but possesses the ability to see into the future (specifically, the ability to see all possible outcomes from any single action, described in the story as similar to a chess player with the ability to see all possible moves 5 steps ahead). The agency manages to capture Cris, but does not execute him immediately, due to their wish to study his ability. Unknown to the agency, Cris turns out to possess another power; his golden skin acts like a lion’s mane and allows him to seduce members of the opposite sex. Cris influences the fiancée into freeing him, then impregnates her and makes his escape. The story ends with the protagonist reflecting on how animal instincts have triumphed over human intellect, and how that is the new direction evolution will take if Cris succeeds in replacing humanity.

Why are you not drinking jelly beans?

THAT IS BONKERS. I bought and ready the Kindle version (it’s only, like, 25 pages), and I was blown away by (a) the crazy story, and (b) how little Next resembles it in just about any way. Cage’s character, Cris Johnson, is quite literally a golden god in the novelette. Here is my favorite quote from the story:

“He’ll get by — as long as human women exist to take care of him. And since he can see ahead, into the future, he already knows he’s sexually irresistible to human females.”

It’s Cage and his real life wife, Alice Kim Cage! She couldn’t resist Cage’s charm, either.

This story was written in 1953 and published in 1954, but it describes a character that Cage was born to play. We’ve talked, time and again, about how Cage always gets the girl. In Next, he plays a character who is literally irresistible to women. KISMET!

Next, as a film, has problems. Its logic and internal consistency are all over the place, and Jessica Biel’s character suffers (in a major way) from Diane Kruger Syndrome (DKS). She’s there, ostensibly, to help propel Cage toward greatness. Instead, she’s turned into a sex object and given nearly nothing to do. Thankfully, Julianne Moore fares better as the leader of the FBI task squad, but even she’s shushed by Cage. Sigh.

Aside from the sexism, it’s easy to overlook the problems Next has because it’s so over-the-top and insane that it renders most criticism moot. There are a few action scenes here where Cage is firing on all cylinders, operating at Peak Cage by knowing exactly where to go and what to do to survive an encounter. The times we do see him act out his abilities, and see all the ways he dies, are fun and clever and creative. This movie’s a tight 96 minutes, and pretty action-packed from wire-to-wire.

Along with KNOWING (which we’ll get to in a week or so), Next is one of Cage’s most hardcore sci-fi movies. Both have lofty ideas and are so entertaining that I wish Cage did more sci-fi movies. But that’s not what Cage does — he’ll dabble in a genre, get us eager for more, and then challenge himself with something brand new.